One month left. Scary!

Think about it

Today I was walking down the street. Instead of trying to imagine myself in Canada, in some nice company doing my internship in the field of Human Resources, I focused my energy only on the fact that I really do not want to spend my summer working in housekeeping or catering anymore. And that is really bad approach. Instead of positive thinking, I was very negative and it cost me so much energy.

The thing is that I really want to learn something during the summer. It is not about being picky, but I guess that I feel that I had enough of these "manual" jobs and it is time to move on. I would like to develop my professional skills related to my major and not my knowledge about "serving the food from left and picking the empty plate from right" or "using pink liquid for the toilet and blue for the mirror" ... Don't get me wrong. I am not degrading any kind of job. I just need to feel some kind of satisfaction. And at this point of my life these jobs do not satisfy me anymore.

And then, I saw this little girl with her mum. The girl (she was maybe six) was blind. And her mum was teaching her how to use the white stick for blind people. And I felt very ungrateful and ashamed. I should never loose hope, enthusiasm and energy. I should continue fighting for my dreams and enjoying my life. I should go on doing what I like. And I should pay more attention to all those beauties all around. That is energy!

Deep inside

I remembered one exact moment from exactly one year ago. My friend asked me: "How come that you always look so satisfied and happy?" I thought about it and I told her: "It is simple, I am satisfied and happy." I really was. And then suddenly, it has gone somewhere with the wind. I am not trying to say that I am completely unhappy and lost, but deep inside, there is something missing. There is something that just do not work as it should. And what makes me even more uncomfortable is that I have no idea what is that. The result of that is that from time to time I just behave in really weird way, I am just surprised by my own reactions.

Sometimes I find myself in a labyrinth and I just cannot find the right way. Finding oneself is always very important. I think it is like getting the ticket for the happiness. You still have to get on the right train, but at least, you know that once there, nobody will tell you that you have to get off.

Hmm this will take probably time. But I will get there one day. Because positive and optimistic thinking is still something that I am very good at.

"Live from my soul"

Sometimes (or quite often??) I tend to make very simple things quite complicated. It makes me feel uncomfortable as well as the others involved. Grrrrrrrrrr I should have been more rational sometimes. Or just stop analyzing everything so much.

Multi-culti

What I enjoy here in Nebraska is its multicultural atmosphere. My room-mate is from South Korea. My best friend here is from South Korea as well. My colleagues in catering are from India. My teachers are respectively from Ethiopia, Philippines, USA and Spain. I met one really nice girl from Japan, I talked to many Latinos from South America. There is huge variety of people from all over the world and all of them are very interesting.

Today we got invited by Indian guys to their place. They cooked for us real Indian food. All I knew about it was that it is usually very spicy. It was, but at the same time I considered in delicious. We ate a lot of rice with many different things, chicken and at the end home-made yogurt. Really delicious!!! And what is more, to fully experience the Indian culture, we ate with our hands. I never tried it before, it might be sometimes quite tough hihi

I am grateful for all these experiences. I guess these are unique moments and it made my life here very lively and interesting.

The Little Mermaid

I kind of believe that some things just find us, because we want them so much and because these things (it can be whatever) are meant to be with us. And if we listen to our intuition, they will come to us. Usually when we less expect it.

Today I went to the second hand bookstore and I was looking for one book. I could not find it, BUT while searching for it, I noticed huge box with Walt Disney books. My heart started beating a little bit faster and I was thinking: "What if..." ... Sleeping Beauty, Lion King... and right between Lion King and Snow White I found it. The Little Mermaid smiled at me and I knew that today I was meant to come to this shop to find this book :-)

Winning the first prize

Today we went for the Chinese night. It was the evening organized by Chinese people from the UNL. We got some good food and several performances took place. Quite interesting. The part of that was also tombola. Hehe and I won one of the two first prizes. Unbelievable. I told Jirka that I never won first prize before. And he told me that my Robitschek Scholarship here at the UNL is also kind of first prize.

It made me thinking about all these first prizes that we actually "win" but sometimes we even do not realize it. I won in so many aspects that I can hardly count it all. I have the best parents on the whole Earth, great brother, wonderful friends, I got uncountable amount of opportunities to experience the world, I "won" healthy body and clear mind...

In reality, I won the first prize so many times in my life. I just do not always realize it.